americankopite:

I’m a little excited.

And drunk.

THE CHAMPIOOOONS

whovianfeminist:

did-you-kno:

A sexually-frustrated husband sent a spreadsheet to his wife detailing the different excuses she used to avoid his advances.

Source

guess what? just because you two are married she’s not entitled to give you sex. Grow up.

cuttlefishgarden:

thecube42:

YOU WOULDNT DOWNLOAD A DRAGON

If I could download a dragon all the cops in the world couldn’t stop me

arbors:

there’s always a white boy in every class that just talks and talks and talks like timothy stop just write it down!! make a mental note!!! wait till after class and tell ya friends on reddit!!

funnybrunette:

do you just ever get so mad that you mentally insult every single thing that people do around you

like 

"hey i finished this question" good for you little fucking brat like wow didnt anyone teach you not to boast

amateurcracksman:

When you get to the bottom of a really shitty post and you have to scroll back up like “who the Heck put this on my dash”

Introducing LFC’s new vice captain, Number 14, Jordan Henderson

shouldnt:

We’ve officially reached that annoying time of year where it’s sweater weather in the morning, but by midday you die from a heatstroke.

punkasfrick:

punkasfrick:

"Son," the father says, examining the broken petri dishes littered about the floor, “I’m not a mad scientist, I’m just a disappointed scientist.”

I don’t even care what you think this is the best post I’ve ever made

daisy-cutting:

x. translation